Father of the Bride: Duties & Etiquette Every Dad Needs to Know

The Father of the Bride role means more than just contributing financially to the wedding. The bride's father is a critical role in any enjoyable wedding.

The father of the bride usually has fewer responsibilities than the mother of the bride, but that doesn’t mean Dad’s role is any less significant. With the bride and her mother engrossed in the actual wedding planning, the father of the bride is the key figure who can support them both along the way.

There are several duties Dads can take on during wedding planning, as well as those time-honored father-of-the-bride wedding day traditions you and your daughter look forward to the most.

Meet the Parents

With today's dating practices, it's possible you've never met your daughter's future in-laws. Anytime before the wedding would be a good time. Perhaps coordinate brunch or dinner with your daughter, future son-in-law, and his parents before the big day—make sure to check for food allergies or preferences before choosing a restaurant.

Are the family members going to be in town for a while? The father of the bride can double as a tour guide and show them around. Get to know their interests ahead of time so you can make recommendations on different sights and restaurants they may enjoy. Be accessible but give them their space. If they’d like a personal guide, offer to escort them; however, if they’re more independent, simply be available for phone calls or texts.

Share Financial Responsibilities

Amid the flurry and pressure of wedding planning, it can be easy to forget that not every family has the same financial practices or situations. As the father of the bride, it’s imperative that you facilitate an open and cordial discussion about sharing financial responsibilities. These responsibilities can be quite dependent on relationships and circumstances, so it’s best that everyone is knowledgeable and comfortable with the arrangement before the big day approaches or budgets get strained.

Make a budget for the wedding day. The father of the bride should support the bride financially with the event while also supporting her vision for the big day. It’s easy to get carried away, so create some healthy boundaries about financial responsibilities that are agreed upon between the father of the bride and the newlyweds. This will ensure you can have a beautiful and enjoyable wedding without stressing over finances or subjecting yourself to a shoestring budget for a subpar day.

Be the Peacemaker

This is a nontraditional but often-overlooked duty. You’ll likely have a stressed-out daughter and a well-meaning-but-probably-also-stressed-out wife who may or may not be making things more taxing. Wedding planning and the wedding day itself can be overwhelming, so it helps to have someone calm and collected to balance it out. Support your daughter’s vision and step in to help when you can. Check on her for the little things like hydration and food, which when lacking can fuel bad moods and anxiety.

Remind both your wife and your daughter of how much you love them and how you’re looking forward to seeing everything come together. Show them affection individually, which is proven to regulate mood. When things get heated, remind your daughter and your wife that they both want the same thing: a beautiful and enjoyable wedding. Encourage your daughter to take a break and be proactive in managing stress and anxiety. Gently remind your wife it’s not her wedding but her daughter’s, and to keep everything in perspective.

Accompany the Bride to the Wedding

The father of the bride is one of the first ones to see the bride in her wedding dress, just before she travels to the venue, and it can get quite emotional. The bride’s father also usually travels with the bride to the wedding venue, and this is a perfect opportunity to have a heartfelt moment with your daughter. Work as her advocate to ensure she’s taken care of. Give her a pep talk when her nerves are running high. Assist her within your comfort level if her bridesmaids are unavailable.

Afarose Insider Tip: Your daughter and wife will have a lot on their minds on the day of the wedding. Help by volunteering to watch the clock and keep everyone running on schedule.

Walk the Bride Down the Aisle

Perhaps the most iconic role for the father of the bride is escorting his daughter down the aisle to her spouse-to-be.

Is the bride prone to jitters? Think ahead of time about discreet things to say as you’re walking her down the aisle to help her feel loved, calm, and focused. Keep a comfortable walking pace to ensure she doesn’t trip on her way down the aisle—this is especially important if the bride is wearing high heels or a very long dress.

Giving your daughter away will undoubtedly be emotional, but nobody wants to be in tears before the ceremony has even started. Try to keep it short but sweet with a hug and a kiss for the bride and perhaps a hug and/or a handshake for the groom, your soon-to-be son-in-law.

Make a Toast

The father of the bride is expected to make a toast or give a speech. This is a perfect moment to thank the guests, make them feel welcome, thank the parties that helped put the wedding together, share anecdotes about the couple, and offer inspiring messages or advice for the newlyweds. It’s important to know your daughter and your audience. This may not be the time to drag on with embarrassing memories; instead, choose tastefully nostalgic memories, should you choose to incorporate them. Run your ideas by the bride if you’re feeling unsure about the content.

Afarose Insider Tip: Fathers can share their own love stories with their wives as a lead-up to their marriage advice for the newlyweds.

Participate in the Father-Daughter Dance

Some fathers may dread being on the dance floor, and if that's the case, efforts to attend a few dance or choreography lessons with the bride would be highly appreciated. Regardless, the father-daughter dance is a moment to be cherished, as it can be both one of the happiest and most emotional moments of the celebration.

It’s important to remember dancing with your daughter is more than just one of your duties and privileges as the father of the bride—this is a special moment. Enjoy it. This isn’t about looking like professional dancers; it’s dancing within your comfort level and making a memory with your little girl. It may be a while before you can dance like this with her again. Treasure it.

Afarose: The Wedding Dress Experts

If there's anything the bride’s father shouldn't worry about, it's the wedding gown.

When brides partner with Afarose, they experience a stress-free shopping process online and enjoy a huge selection of different designs and colors. Afarose has dresses to suit a variety of styles, cuts, and colors for the bride’s special day, and don’t forget to tell her how beautiful she looks.

Take bridal party collaboration to another level! Visit Afarose’s newest interactive virtual showroom feature for gown inspiration and style ideas. Bridal party members can collaborate with other bridesmaids, and the bride can add comments for the bridal party about dress options and get feedback all in one convenient platform in real-time.